Ian Thrope Been trying to change my template... As you can seem it's a failure. :( But i'll try again. Today is a really packed day for me. Met 2 of my best friends to give one of them a very belated present. It was not what i wanted of course... To tell the truth i'm only beginning to feel slightly free after the attachment in Bedok Polyclinic. Seen lots of changes in my friend and i was hoping to have a chance to change too. Sometimes i'm very sick and tired of myself being myself. So at times i try to behave differently to achieve some excitement ( i'm not a having split personality ok), however i prefer myself to be someone more quiet. Most of my friends are those who keep alot to themselves and i always think that i tend to "reveal" too much of myself by talking too much. Eventually they seemed to know more abt me then vice versa. Ask yourself, each time you meet up with yr friends, do you contribute or just listen to everything he/she says? To be frank, i'd be v frustrated if u r ignorant abt certain issues and was later found out that you knew quite a deal abt it. I felt cheated. You obviously don't trust me! Absolutely no excuse for that. I have to admit that sometimes i talk cos i don't like the feeling of being too quiet with my friends. Why meet up if u don't wanna talk? Might as well just SMS or meet in MSN? I confide my friends when i'm troubled but i also realised that they don't do the same! Am I abnormal? Am I being too naive? Or they just don't trust me? That feeling despairs me. Maybe i'm too troublesome after all. After my attachment in Polyclinic, i began to have a special affection towards being a loner. How different... I used to be afraid of being lonely. Not feeling unhappy today, just that i have the strong inspiration to bring this matter up. Besides this, i'm generally very pleased with my weekends so far. Went for a gathering in my teacher's hse and also went for my 1st SSO gala concert on Friday. Definitely it's more than just an exposure for me. Hope all my sec sch mates are doing fine and looking forward to meet them again. Take Care guys! 4E1 rules!
gecko85 obsessed with Jay Chou (>,<) Sunday, September 05, 2004
